Good Monday Morning July 15, 2024

It’s been a few months since I wrote a blog post. And before that, it had been almost a year.

What have I been up to? Many of you may not know that in 2010, my husband passed away from a tragic work accident. My faith in God remained strong through my grief, but the light of joy in my life was buried in darkness. For several years, I floundered like a fish out of water as I tried to find my path as a widowed single mom.

After my kids were raised, I found my way back to church to stay. In November 2021 I returned to the church I was raised, married, buried my parents and my husband in. Friends welcomed me back with open arms.

I began working with the Sunday morning children’s ministry. That led to writing curriculum, coming up with ideas and activities for usually two or three children.

I found my joy in life again.

But I stopped writing fiction. Instead, my focus was on God’s word. Bringing stories and Bible truths to life for kids. My heart expanded as I found fulfillment spending time with the kids.

Soon, almost three years had passed since I’d written a word of fiction. I really felt there were stories in my head that needed to be told, about characters who’d stayed in the back of my mind as I went about the normalcy of life. Every time I tried to write about them, however, I felt writer’s block.

In June, a few weeks ago, I rented a room at a bed and breakfast in a town not far away from home. The 130-year-old house with 11,000 square feet was steeped in local history. They had a twenty-four hour kitchen and my favorite brand of coffee with a Keurig.

I’d recently purchased a mini word processor that was like a laptop only made for writing. There aren’t many editing keys so it’s hard to go back and change what I write. That moves the story forward without distractions. I put it to use. One early morning in their back sunroom I broke through the writer’s block.

I returned home, and within three weeks I’d completed a novella. I’m currently working on a sequel to one of my other books and hope to have it done this month. Ambitious, you might say, but doable.

What happened to writing for children’s ministry?

There are many good resources available and while I am stepping back as leader of the children’s program, I am going to continue as a helper or shift my focus to the younger age.

God is faithful. In spite of my husband’s death, or maybe because of it, I understand the faithfulness of God. There were dark times, but God shone his light through them, like light through the trees of a forest. Friends, family and especially my children brought joyous moments and filled my life with love and blessings.

One day, I broke through the forest. The joy of the Holy Spirit brought me out of the darkness and shadows.

Was it easy? Was it perfect?

No, and no. But it was a change that I felt and showed in the way I looked at life and handled its challenges.

Walk this road with me. Cast all your grief and failures on Jesus. His shoulders are strong enough to carry your burdens. His Holy Spirit longs to fill your heart with joy and love and peace and all of the blessings of God the Father.

In times of uncertainty, I choose to remain faithful to God and stand in his strength. Let me be the hand that reaches out to you and helps you out of the pit of darkness.

The Testing of my Faith

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4

I don’t know if my faith has ever been tested as much as it has been in the last three months. After I lost my husband in 2010 I spent many years in grief, then a lingering depression. Yet in all those times I never doubted that God was with me and had a plan for my life.

As recently as July of this year, I felt that God had brought me out of the dark times in my life and I was now living in the light of His blessings. Things were going amazingly well.

Then in August, my tower of faith began to tumble, one brick at a time. I’ve shared much of the struggles over the past few months in previous blog posts, so I won’t get into the details here.

I think my faith was tested in every way possible.

Well, I thought it had been every way possible.

Now as I face a health challenge and uncertainty about the results, I find that my faith is wavering.

The “What-Ifs” are building up this health problem into the worst case scenarios even as I try to tell myself it’s probably nothing and will easily be resolved. It’s human nature to worry, to want to control the outcome anything we come up against.

Then as our plans start to crumble, we realize how little control we have over some areas of our life.

God is faithful.

He is a good God.

He has a plan for my future.

He is my Provider.

He is my Healer.

I believe these promises for a fact.

Yet I know that everything doesn’t go according to “MY” plan.

I can’t see beyond today to know what “HIS” plan is for me. But I can trust in His unfailing love.

Good Monday Morning 6-27-22

Loss.

Loss. There is no way to avoid it. In this world that is temporary, we humans will experience many kinds of losses.

This morning I am grieving the loss of my my dad. Although it’s been 17 years since he passed away, the anniversary date was this weekend.

The loss of my dad was made harder because of losing my mom the previous November. With both gone, I had no parents. The oldest generation in my immediate family was gone.

My siblings and I are now the oldest generation. My parents died too young but both lived a full life. Their Christian faith inspired me to serve the Lord in church ministry. They were both involved in their local churches since young adulthood. There are many who have expressed gratitude for my parents’ Christian influence. There will be many jewels in their heavenly crowns for the souls they won to Christ.

When my dad passed away, good friends gave us a basket of plants that my siblings gave it to me. My husband and I planted one in front of our deck. It thrived. It’s called a Spirea plant. It blooms with white flowers that turn purple. The blooms don’t last very long but…

It blooms on almost the same day that my dad passed away. This past weekend was the anniversary date. Sure enough, the white flowers popped out and are already turning purple.

Beside the plant we put a stepping stone that was given to us by the same family at the funeral of my mom. It reads, “When someone you love becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.” It is very fitting because I treasure the memories of both Mom and Dad.

A few years ago, my youngest son asked who was buried there. I didn’t realize he thought it was a grave. I assured him no one was and that it was a memorial stone. I don’t know if he remembers his grandparents as he was only four when they passed away. But he was loved by them and their love will always be a part of him.

My parents left a legacy of faith and love that touched many lives that I pray will continue on through my children also.