Good Monday Morning 1-3-22.

Whew!

The holidays are behind us.

Shopping and baking and wrapping gifts (although I cheat and use gift bags mostly).

Decorating and undecorating (my decorations are still up. Maybe I’ll get them down and put away this week).

Overeating……(Enough said about that. It’s back to “regular food” this week).

I still have one more Christmas celebration this coming weekend, the gathering of my siblings and their families.

We won’t all be together. As our kids have grown up, some have to work on that weekend; others have moved away.

But I will see my sisters and brother and their spouses. I love to spend time with my siblings.

We always find things to laugh about, even when we are going through tough circumstances.

I remember when we were at the funeral home, after my dad passed away, making final arrangements (my mom had died a few months prior to that). It was definitely a time of grief. But we didn’t see any casket that we liked that really said “dad.” The funeral director said he had one that just came back and brought it in to show it to us. It made us chuckle to think that a casket had returned empty to the funeral home. (I understand why that happens, and it’s really nothing to joke about. But at that moment, it struck us as funny).

Right after my husband passed away, we were sitting in the hospital waiting for the final paperwork. It was not a time for laughing. But I stuck my foot in my mouth when I said something negative about a person who was standing right next to me. I nudged my brother-in-law and said, “You should have stopped me from saying that.” He said, “There wasn’t time.” (I still chuckle when I remember that moment, in spite of being embarrassed).

Those moments of levity during difficult times are part and parcel of being in my large family. My dad could always see the humor in everything. My mom loved to joke around and laugh.

I’m so thankful that my parents taught us how to laugh, even if the laughter is at our own expense.

In December I lost a beloved aunt and one of my good friends passed away from Covid. Other families have lost loved ones as well. I don’t find anything funny in either of their deaths. Those times of levity during my times of grief were to help me get through it. I would never laugh at someone else’s grief.

These two deaths bring back memories of my own days of living in a fog from grief. It took several months for me to begin to live “normally” again after my husband passed away. Of course I had to get up every morning and feed the kids and get them off to school, but for a long time I felt like I was just going through the motions.

That first holiday without him was so hard to get through. It didn’t get any easier the following year when we again celebrated without him.

Eleven years have passed since then. My kids have grown up and are independent adults. I know they still grieve their father. But we have enjoyed our time together the past few holidays.

This year we celebrated on Christmas Eve as is our tradition, with a nice dinner. Then we opened our presents and watched Christmas Vacation with Chevy Chase. It is my favorite holiday movie. While parts of it are crass, it is so over-the-top ridiculous that I laugh all the way through it.

I thank God for the gift of laughter.

As I said, my parents were a good example at how to get through the dark times while keeping their sense of humor. My siblings and I enjoy our time together and laugh so much over the silliest of things.

For a long time, when my kids were younger, I forgot how to laugh. I dealt with depression for most of my life and as a mom overwhelmed by the stresses of life, I didn’t find much to laugh about. I remember attending a bridal shower and my aunts were joking around so much that my face hurt from smiling. There are times when it’s like that with my siblings, also.

I hope that I have passed on that gift of humor to my children. They saw me angry and depressed in their younger years, then navigate the ups and downs of life after I received the diagnosis for bipolar disorder. Medication and counseling helped take away the anger, although I still struggle with depression at times.

During the past 11 years, they’ve watched me grieve their and come through the Valley of the Shadow of their father’s death. I hope they realize that I am a survivor and see me thriving in life despite hard circumstances we’ve all been through.

My parents left a legacy of the gift of humor. I hope that when my kids look back on my life one day, they will remember that I laughed often.

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Cozy up this New Year’s Eve with a warm holiday novella.

Author’s inspiration:

When I wrote the first book, Angelica’s Christmas Wish, I was reluctant to end the story. Mark and Serena had connected with one another and fallen in love, as they returned to their faith on Christmas Eve. I decided to write a sequel because I wanted to know what happened to Mark and Serena next. Their story continues in this novella, Serena’s New Year’s Wish.

About the book:

When Serena Cole came to Chicago for a fresh start, she never imagined she’d save a little girl from getting hit by a car, or that her new boss would turn out to be the little girl’s father. Now, Serena must decide if she can work for the man she’s quickly falling in love with. Her heart has plenty of room for Mark and his daughter, but she wants more than he’s willing to give, and that could very well be a dealbreaker for her.

Mark Harper never wanted a second chance at love—until Serena came into his life. He’s certain she’s the one, but when she asks for the one thing he can’t give her, he’s not so certain of their future. Can he let go of his fear and give Serena the one thing she wants above all else, or will his inability to budge drive her away forever?

Excerpt:

On Christmas morning, Serena Cole sat on the sofa in the home where she’d spent the last two nights. When she’d woken up in the hospital three days ago, she hadn’t remembered where she was, or her own name. She’d been told that she’d run out in front of a car to push a little girl to safety, ending up with a broken collarbone and amnesia. When she was released from the hospital the next morning, Mark, the child’s widowed father, had brought her here to his home that he shared with his former mother-in-law.

Fortunately, the amnesia had been temporary. Last night, on Christmas Eve, Serena had remembered her name and the circumstances that had brought her from North Carolina to Chicago. She’d come to start a new job, escaping her sorrowful past and starting over fresh. They were all surprised to find out that Mark was the lawyer she’d been hired to work for. At one time, she would have thought meeting Mark and his family was a coincidence. Now, she believed God had brought her here.

She stole a glimpse at Mark, who was looking back at her. The tenderness in his smile caused a flutter in her heart that she hadn’t experienced since becoming a widow three years earlier. She glanced back toward the little girl she’d saved. Angelica had broken her arm, but that was her only injury. Angelica was playing with her new doll. Watching Angelica open her gifts this morning had brought back memories of Serena’s daughter, Maggie. She’d bought Maggie a farm set for her beloved horses. Maggie had squealed with delight, much as Angelica had this morning when she opened her doll. Serena hadn’t known that would be the last Christmas she’d have with her daughter.

She sighed and felt a warm hand wrap around hers. “Are you feeling okay?” Mark asked. “You look sad.”

“I was remembering my daughter. Angelica reminds me so much of her.”

Download it today on Kindle or Kindle Unlimited and enjoy this holiday romance.

It is also available in paperback.

Good Wednesday Morning 12-29-21.

I know, I usually do a Monday morning post. This week, after a busy holiday weekend, I spent Monday resting and reading.

Loss of a couple of people I cared about came in December. A heaviness set in as the holiday approached. Fortunately, my kids helped me get the house ready and prepared for the holiday. I couldn’t have done any of it without their help.

It’s nice to have adult children who show me their love by acts of service and gifts. I appreciated both their hard work and the presents they gave me.

They gifted me with a coffee pot that has a 12 cup carafe on one side and a one-cup serving on the other side. Instead of a Keurig and K-cups, it uses your own coffee grounds. My son’s girlfriend gifted me with flavored coffees.

I hate to think how many cups I drank over the weekend as I tested out that one-cup pot and all the different flavors. I had a hard time going to sleep, and it’s no wonder with all the caffeine in me.

I think that’s why I slept in Monday and stayed in my pajamas so long, reading on my Kindle. A chance to recuperate from my lack of sleep and the busyness of preparing and clean up.

I went back to work this morning. I have two more days of housecleaning and then I get a paid holiday on New Year’s Eve, so a three-day weekend. I’m planning to undecorate.

I don’t make new year’s resolutions per se, but I always take this time at the end of the year to think about what I can do differently to improve my lifestyle. I have neglected taking care of myself physically since before Thanksgiving, so it gives me a fresh start to get back into better eating and exercise habits.

I’ve neglected my spiritual self, also. Instead of starting every day with time in devotions and in the Word, I’ve drank a lot of coffee and spent a lot of time on social media.

I think it all goes together. If I am putting God first, then I become disciplined in other areas of my life as well. As I yield to His will, I am able to say no to the things that are harmful and commit to better choices.

I sat down to write this post and the hymn “Fill Me Now” came to mind. The words,

“Hover o’er me Holy Spirit, bathe my trembling heart and brow; fill me with Thy hallowed presence; come o come and fill me now.”

How appropriate those words are as I contemplate where I’ve been in the past few weeks and where I am headed in the New Year. I’m posting a link to the lyrics video below. I hope it touches your heart and encourages you as it did me.

Good Monday Morning.

The sun is bright this morning as I write this post. I woke up the first time at 4:00. I got up then, fed the animals and took my pills. Instead of getting a cup of coffee and sitting at the computer to fire up my social media, I decided to go back to bed. My sons bought me an electric blanket last Christmas and I had that on, and it’s so warm that it’s hard to roll out of bed.

Fortunately it’s my day off so it didn’t matter what time I got up. I got up at 9:00. So that’s why the sun is shining brightly as I write.

My heart is light, reflecting the bright sunshine. I feel rested mentally as well as physically. Just last night I found myself grieving my losses and had a heavy heart. So to wake up refreshed, with a more positive outlook, is a blessing from God.

I like to listen to a variety of music. Sometimes a song just says what my heart is feeling. This morning, if I had to name a song that reflected my emotions, it would be:

JOY TO THE WORLD.

This Christmas carol is one of my favorites for the simple reason that my middle name is “Joy.” I haven’t always liked my name, because it sounds so Christmassy.

Carol Joy.

Christmas carols, Christmas joys.

While I wasn’t always impressed with my name, I turned around and gave my daughter an equally Christmas-sounding name:

Holly Joy.

There have been many Christmases where I was anything but joyful as the holiday approached. When we were first married, we were so stressed with shopping for so many people that I became overwhelmed with the decisions on what gifts to buy.

Then we had our kids, and I always spent more than what we could afford, often using credit cards to make up the difference.

I never really set up a Christmas budget, although I opened several Christmas savings accounts over the years. I always spent the money when it came in October, instead of using it for Christmas.

A lack of funds meant we were scrambling at the last minute to have enough for gifts, and so we were always shopping the weekend before Christmas when the stores were so crowded and picked over.

Stressful.

In the past few years, I’ve managed to do most of my shopping online or early, negating the need for last minute trips to the stores. It makes my life less stressful.  A couple of years ago I cut up my credit cards and haven’t used them since. I don’t always have a lot of cash at Christmas, but I try to spend within what I can afford.

And my kids have been wonderful with the changes. We give each other meaningful gifts and truly enjoy spending the time together as we unwrap them on Christmas Eve.

I have great kids. They aren’t children anymore, at 30, 28 and 21. But they are the greatest blessings God has ever given me. I am so thankful for their health and their companionship. They have stood by me through the difficult seasons.

This Christmas season, 2021, I am truly rejoicing in the gifts that my Heavenly Father has given me:

Peace of mind. Although parts of my life are still unsettled, I have peace about where I am headed in my life.

Love. The unconditional love of not only my children, but of my extended family who have supported me through the difficult times.

Fellowship. I recently started going back to church. Sporadic church attendance since my husband died led to complete withdrawal during Covid. A few weeks ago I decided it was time to get out of my own head and get back into worship.

Children’s Ministry. As I returned to church, I also started working with children again, in a leadership capacity. Planning lessons and teaching the children’s church has been a big blessing to me, a return to something I truly enjoy.

Book sales. I had a great time in November with author events both online and in person. I like to meet the people who read my books. It’s always good to hear compliments about my stories. I especially like to know when they have touched someone’s heart.

I don’t know how much I “made” during the holiday season, but the amount isn’t important to me. The goal is to bring the message of God’s love to the world by writing fiction. The characters in my book have realistic struggles in their faith and relationships and I always try to bring about a resolution that reflects my own faith.

A job that fulfills me. Working as a housekeeping aid to the elderly has given me a good way to physically earn a living. I also get to meet some fascinating seniors and hear their stories. As my job becomes more consistent, it is enough to pay my bills.

My pets. I complain sometimes about having so many cats in the house, but really, they have all become part of our family. Not that they are my children, but each has a unique personality that keeps our lives interesting.

And of course, my Black lab, Rosie, is my baby. She turned 12 this year. She is very protective of me. When someone comes to the door, she gets right between me and them and doesn’t move back unless I tell her to. She also tends to be naughty and gets into the cat food and other things she shouldn’t, but she is a good companion.

Food, shelter and clothing. All these things God has provided in one way or another and I am glad for the fact that He has taken such good care of me.

Grace. God has given me grace for each moment, for each day, as I have learned to lean on Him through the difficult days. Sometimes I didn’t think I would make it through, but always, He has been there to carry me when I could not walk, to bring people into my life to encourage and support me when I did not think I could go on. His grace is sufficient for me. When I am weak, then He is strong.

And finally, I am thankful for the gift of JOY.

My heart is full this morning of joy.

Of gladness.

Of the truth that Jesus is alive and well.

I am thankful for the name that my parents bestowed on me.

Carol Joy. In my heart there is a song of Joy.

Joy to the World, the Lord has come.
Let Earth receive her King.
Let every heart prepare him room.

And heaven and nature sing.

And heaven and nature sing.

And heaven, and heaven and nature sing.

Merry Christmas to all.

Today’s Featured Book:

About the Book:

“One More Santa” is a Texas Christmas story about a young woman, Cassie, who is not only busy, but content with her life as a sports photographer, CEO of her family charity, The Santa House Women’s Charity, and a big help to her boisterous family. When Talent Marshall comes to town, though, his new duties to help protect the women at The Santa House during the busiest season of the year, puts him in Cassie’s path. Now, she has the opportunity to see if adding romance to her life could be her Christmas gift to herself this year.

Excerpt from One More Santa:

“He wasn’t wearing a ring.” Betty sat on a bench in the cell and held her hands out for Ruby to come sit with her. “And he was certainly a handsome one.”

Cassie shook her head. Apparently the missing niece was forgiven, and her sister was moving on to rescue something else – her love life. “Stop it.” She glared. “I am too busy for your match-making.”

Cassie wasn’t sure how she could fit filling her truck up with gas, much less dating, into her schedule these days. Between being the CEO of the Santa House, running a successful sports photography business, and helping her family with the diner or with chauffeuring her niece from one archery tournament to another, her plate was full. And she was content with her plate as it was.

“Well, somebody has to do it. You’re certainly not helping yourself out in that department. When was the last time you went on a date?”

Just as Betty asked the question the same officer that rescued Ruby appeared in the doorway. Cassie cringed. She shot a stern glance at Betty and covered her face with her hand.

Once he was gone, Cassie gave Betty the side-eye. “Really? Betty, why? Why do you have to do that?” Cassie sank onto the bench and covered her face with her hands.

“If it makes you feel better,” Betty spoke cautiously in a low tone, “I don’t think he noticed the dirt streak on your face.”

About the Author:

Delaina Netherland Smiley is an East Texas native, who lives in the country with her husband, her three fun teenagers/young adult children, and a house full of dogs. She’s a Community Engagement Coordinator for CASA for Kids of East Texas by day, a writer by night, and a hobby photographer whenever she gets the chance. Her favorite genre of books is, of course, romance (faith-based, military, contemporary and historical), but her music playlist is oddly eclectic (at least, according to her children). She loves to go fishing at the lake and she can’t get enough of watching her children excel in their own varied talents and ambitions. She also enjoys being the next-door aunt and loves time spent with her tight-knit family, who serve up all the creative inspiration she could ever need.