Author: Carol Underhill

Problem or Progress?

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Last August I struggled to get through work on the days surrounding the anniversary of my husband’s death. My boss, a former social worker, was very understanding but suggested that I might want to take some time off around that anniversary this year.

In March I put in for a week off from August 15 through August 19. With the two weekends, that would give me 11 days for a nice break.

At first I had plans to go away for a few days. With some canceled clients and cutting back my schedule in May and June, that no longer seemed feasible.

So I decided on a Staycation.

I scheduled some important doctor visits. One was for my physical, and as the time crept closer I had some concerns I wanted to go over with my doctor. When it was time for that appointment, her office called to change the date.

On Tuesday I had my teeth cleaned and examined. I’m going to need some work due to damage from dry mouth, caused by medications. They can’t get me in until January to get the work done.

I had a meeting at church on Tuesday afternoon. We’re planning some fun curriculum and met to get things set in motion.

I had the sniffles, but on Wednesday it turned into sinus congestion and aches and pains.

I took two Covid tests later that night and both were positive.

The second one was to confirm the first one because I was hoping it was wrong.

Before I knew it was Covid I’d had lunch with my sister who’d taken me to town to put my paperwork in. I didn’t feel like driving that morning. I blamed it on the stress of it being the date that my husband had his work accident, but it also might have been the fact that I was not feeling well physically.

So that led to cancellation of plans on Thursday. I was scheduled for a routine doctor appointment in the “city” and another sister and I planned a day of thrift store shopping around my appointment. I had to cancel all of it.

I also had to cancel my haircut, which I desperately need and had set up for Friday afternoon.

Originally I wanted to do something memorable with my three adult children in honor of their dad. Instead, we got takeout from Pizza Hut, which was his favorite place to eat. My oldest son doesn’t live with me and in order not to be exposed to Covid, he dropped off our order.

My younger son and daughter were exposed before I knew I had it, and they’d had it in the spring (I had too, but it had been a mild case). They fortunately didn’t get sick.

It wasn’t the vacation I’d hoped for.

It wasn’t the stress-free time I’d been looking forward to.

I was due to return to work on Monday, August 22. But I ended up in the ER with chest pain and congestion instead. Things were normal in the Xray but they gave me a steroid for the inflammation and an inhaler. The doctor also recommended I not return to work until Wednesday and my boss agreed.

I canceled Tuesday clients, and one was angry enough about all the rescheduling and missed appointments that he canceled service. I couldn’t have done anything differently.

Tuesday afternoon my daughter had an appointment that she needed a driver for so I took her. I sat in the car and ran the AC intermittently with the windows down for short amounts of time. She was nearly an hour in the appointment.

Afterward, we went through the Taco Bell drive thru so she could get something and take some food home to her brother.

I pulled into a gas station to use the restroom and shut the car off. It wouldn’t restart.

After waiting a while, I called my son, and my brother, who both came. They jumped the car but it wouldn’t start. My brother is good at car work and said it was the starter. Since there was no way to get it home, I had it towed. My younger son paid the bill because I didn’t have money in the bank to cover a towing fee.

We got home around seven o’clock Tuesday night.

On Wednesday I contacted my clients to let them know I’d had Covid as a courtesy in case they didn’t want contact. They did want me to clean, so I worked for 3 hours yesterday.

When I called today’s clients to do the same, they all three requested that I not come to their houses today and would wait until next scheduled appointment.

To say I’m frustrated at this point would be putting it mildly. Each setback chips away at my faith a little. I’m stronger than I was at this time last year, but I feel like each day is a struggle right now. It has nothing to do with having bipolar disorder or depression, but it’s dealing with the problems that causes me to weaken and feel unsure of the future.

Even though I’m experiencing some problems with health/car/work, I’m making progress. I acknowledge there are things that are out of my control. I submit to the Lord, Who is present even in these difficulties.

I know He has a plan for my life. (Jeremiah 29:11).

I know that in all things He works together for my good. (Romans 8:28)

I know that even when I cannot see Him working, He knows the way that I take. And when I have been tested, I will come forth as gold. (Job 23:10)

Fortunately I have the support of family, friends and a boss who understands. I’m not where I’d hoped to be this week, but I am in the palm of the Father’s hand. He will never leave me nor forsake me. (Hebrews 13:5)

Cat Tails: Cora

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Cora is a 6-year-old, spayed, domestic shorthaired cat.


Cora has a rather tragic story behind her.

Cora came to the Animal Rescue Coalition from a home with 13 cats when her owner passed away.  She had noticeable eye issues so we took her to the vet and found out she had eye ulcers. 

Cora was treated and her left eye is back to 98%.  Her right eye will always have some white cloudiness and limited vision but the ulcer is gone. 

Cora is loving, playful, and gets along with all the other cats at ARC. 

She loves to strut around with a glitter ball in her mouth and loves attention. 

This beautiful, playful girl would be a great addition to any family

If you have room in your heart and home for Cora, you may find out more about adoption through The Animal Rescue Coalition of Mecosta County, Michigan.

http://www.arcofmecostacounty.com

From the Archives: Get Up and Try Again

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Week 4 of my Journey out of the Pit

During the process of healing from my depression, I found that maintaining change was hard work. After just a few weeks of counseling sessions, I was already failing in my attempts to get out of the pit.

I felt like I was in a downward cycle. I felt overwhelmed. I couldn’t maintain the house or remind myself of the truths I’d memorized.

I couldn’t find my way back out of the pit.

My counselor shared with me these Bible verses from Job:

Job 23:8-10

8 “But if I go to the east, he is not there;
    if I go to the west, I do not find him.
9 When he is at work in the north, I do not see him;
    when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him.
10 But he knows the way that I take;
    when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.

My counselor said that even though I couldn’t find God in my life, He knew where I was.

He was with me in the pit even though I couldn’t see Him.

My feelings were all over the place. My counselor reminded me that feelings are not facts. That’s why I needed to latch onto the truths I had learned.

She also said that it’s okay to slip and fall. But I had to make a choice: I could lie in the pit, or I could apply the tools I’d learned and continue to move forward.

It’s okay to pray, “No, I really can’t do this, but God, if You help me, I’ll try.”

In those low moments, we need go back to these verses in Job. God knows where we are. He is with us, even when we don’t feel His presence or see Him.

And we don’t give up hope.

We get back up, and we try again.

It’s now been several years since I began the process of healing from depression. I wish I could say that it’s easy, but it has ups and downs. I slid back into the pit a couple of times, but never as low as I was before I started counseling.

These days, I live above the pit. By the Grace of God, applying what I’ve learned through counseling, and with support of family and friends, I can fight the darkness that drags me to the edge.

I stand strong most of the time, but sometimes a person says things that hit me wrong, I make a mistake that I perceive as dumb, or a circumstance that I can’t avoid happens. (Like when a new job didn’t work out–more than once).

Then my feelings start to get in the way of the truths I have learned about myself. I falter in my steps and slide a little closer to the pit.

When that happens, I do these things:

I attend counseling sessions so my counselor can help me get back on track.

I also read my Bible often, and pray for myself and for others.

I listen to music. With a music app, I can set up a playlist for every mood.

I take care of myself physically through regular exercise, healthy eating choices and getting enough sleep. (Not always, but often enough to make a difference in how I feel).

I do a lot of journaling, as well as other forms of writing.

I have friends and family who offer emotional support.

My counselor said I remind her of the Energizer bunny. Remember those commercials? I slip, I fall sometimes, but I always get back up and try again to move forward.

Proverbs 24:16 says:

” for though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again”

It’s by the grace of God and all of the above-mentioned efforts that I am able to keep out of the pit.

Still, one year later and 8.5 years after my first counseling appointment, I need to reset my mind and thoughts often. I don’t handle change very well, and my social anxiety is sometimes off the charts. But the only way to move is forward.

Psalm 46:1 says it all:

God is our refuge and strength,
    an ever-present help in trouble.

Meet the Author: Christina Sinisi

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My guest today is author Christina Sinisi. She is here to tell us about the recently released third book in her Summer Creek series, Why They Call It Falling.

Christina, let’s start with telling us a little bit about yourself.

Thank you, Carol, for having me as a guest on your blog!

Why They Call It Falling is my fourth published book and I’m very proud of this one because, more than any of my other books, the story weds my two selves—psychologists and romance writer. I am a psychology professor and department chair in my day job.

My husband and I will be married thirty-six years as of August. We have two grown children and a crazy cat, Chessie Mae.

I have several cats myself, so I understand a crazy one.

I absolutely love this cover photo. What is Why They Call It Falling about?

Formerly the wild child of three sisters, Emma Marano grew up to be a single mom working two jobs, estranged from her mother, and lying to her friends. She’d told everyone that her daughter’s father wanted nothing to do with his child, but her own inability to deal with her mistakes and shame led to the biggest lie of her life.

Years later, Justin Lee stumbles upon what turns out to be a daughter he never knew he had. Angry and confused, he insists on having a relationship with his daughter, but to do so, he’ll need to rebuild some sort of relationship with Emma, too. As he gets to know his daughter—and Emma again—he soon realizes that his biggest mistake was leaving her all those years ago. Now, Justin has to decide if he can see past her flaws and forgive her lies, and together, they’ll have to work to reclaim their love and a faith in each other and in God, or they risk losing something precious in the process.

What is the inspiration behind your story?

Why They Call It Falling is the third book in the Summer Creek series, or it can be read as a stand-alone. The inspiration came from the first book—Emma did some pretty hard-to-understand things and I needed to understand why she did them. Everything went from there—why did she seemingly abandon a daughter she loved, why was her daughter’s father not part of the story, and how did she end up with him at the end of the first book? Hmmm…

You lead a very busy life. How do you find time in your day to write?

I am a psychology professor and department chair. The honest answer is, sometimes I don’t have time to write. Then, I forgive myself and know that I will get back to it when I can. In the summer, and on breaks, I write as much as I can. My advice to anyone is to be patient with yourself.

Are you a night owl or morning person?

I almost didn’t answer this one, but maybe I should. I have actually heard some people say that they thought all creative people stay up late at night. I don’t. I’m one of those regimented people—I need to be up in the morning to exercise and get to work so I calculate eight hours back to make sure I get the right amount of sleep. Then, I write when I can. If I need to write in the evening because that’s all I’ve got, I do. In the summers, writing becomes my job (once I get these darned annual reports done for the university). I get up in the morning, eat breakfast, shower, and then write as if it was my paying job. At best, I set word count goals. My best ever was 25 pages in a day, but my more typical is around 5 – 10 when I get going.

Do you reward yourself when a book is finished? If so, what is your favorite treat?

I love to lounge in a comfy chair on my screen porch with a fruity drink and a good book, get in the pool, read some more, repeat. 😊

Who was your favorite character to create?

My favorite characters are the children. I’m a child psychologist, volunteer in the nursery, just love the little ones. And in fiction, they can offer a welcome break from the heavy stuff the adults are going through.

I love to read books with children in them. They are precious, aren’t they?

How did you come up with the names of your hero and/or heroine?

I have a habit of choosing names from people I know, as a way of honoring them. The problem comes in when the original thinks the character in the story is supposed to be them. No, the characters are themselves, unique and different.

Are you a plotter or a panster?

I am a plotter and use story boards, but then sometimes the story takes over. I’ll refer back to the story boards every once in awhile but I am not a slave to it. I’m thrilled to be teaching a class for ACFW At Home Conference on storyboarding with faith. Hope some of your readers can watch the video!

Christina, thank you for being my guest today and sharing part of your life with us. What’s next for you as an author?

I have one book (a follow-up to Christmas on Ocracoke) under consideration, another book I need to edit, and I’ve started a third.

Where can readers find you online?

Website/Blog: https://www.christinasinisi.com/ 

Social Networking Sites:

Twitter: @ChristinaSinisi

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Christina-Sinisi-Author-105861987440664/?modal=admin_todo_tour

Instagram: @csinisi123

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/csinisi/

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/user/show/101218889-christina-sinisi

Bookbub:  https://www.bookbub.com/profile/christina-sinisi

Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/They-Call-Falling-Christina-Sinisi-ebook/dp/B0B1GF6FBC/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=Christina+Sinisi&qid=1654020461&s=books&sr=1-2